Musing

Hey people, sorry it's been a while. I've tried to write before, but my life is kind of boring right now so there just wasn't much to say. My days are full of doing very interny things at work, not that much interesting stuff to report on that front. Once I get home I don't really want to do anything, mostly just watch the Office. I don't want to grow up and do this whole working all day thing, although at school I'd have classes, work, and then homework all evening, but it's not as exhausting because class is intermitent, work is short, and homework is followed by hanging out with friends. The reality that this adventure is ending is beginning to sink it as I passed the one month mark until I come home. I miss my family and my friends, but I really like it here and I've made friends here too and I don't want to leave. It will be good to be home too, though; I've started listing all the reasons I'm looking forward to going home.

In lieu of current events to write about, I think I'll muse on an issue I've been thinking about lately. For a long time I've said that I want to be an editor, but lately I've reconsidered this plan. For one thing, what I see editors doing at my company is not what I want to do, and while I want to work in publishing and not the nonfiction that Flame Tree does, I still have doubts. A couple days ago I was watching Elizabethtown and there was one scene that really struck me. The main character was at the viewing for his father who had just died and the actor just made the moment amazing through the most minute changes in his posture. By imperceptable degrees, he hunched his shoulders, an action which not only made him look more tentative and vulnerable in itself, but it also made the sleeves of his sports coat inch down on his fists, which made him look like a little boy in clothes too big for him. At other points in the movie there are flashbacks of him with his father when he was just a kid and it just made the moment so poignant. I want to find a career that takes advantage of the fact that I notice and love things like this. It would mean a move from a difficult to get into industry (publishing) to one even more so, and I hope I never say the phrase "make it in movies," but you never know.

I'm sure I'm giving all of my parents a heartattack with that comment, and my film studies brother, but hey, I'm finding myself in London, right? Who knows where I'll end up; I'm almost halfway through my third year of college and the real world is looming. Frankly, I'm terrified. I crave more safe years of school without having to think about my real future. Maybe that's why everyone goes to grad school.

Probably not the "this is what I did this day" you were expecting.

I want to wish my brother a happy birthday and thank him for being my best friend. Ben, you are one of the hardest things about being in this country. I miss you and I hope you have the best birthday (and that you enjoy your London present). I can't wait to watch movies with you on the couch at home and listen to music together. I love you.

Good night